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Today’s guest is Kevin Torres.
We go deep today talking about:
- How to destroy your dad bod for good
- Why staying fit as a busy dad doesn’t require hours of work and sacrificing your family
- Kevin’s 5 Step Plan to getting fit and leaving a legacy of health and fitness for your kids
- The 7 Habits that will lead to success if you follow them every day
- Understanding that every fitness program works, and the difference between success and failure
- The importance of community, accountability, and having a guide
- Simple frameworks for getting fit without crazy dieting or falling off the wagon
Kevin Torres of Dad Bod WOD is a father of 3 little girls and the founder and head coach of the Forging Elite Fathers Program. Kevin has made it his mission to help busy dads go from Dad Bod to Fit Dad without sacrificing family time while creating a legacy of health and fitness for their families and generations to come.
Find Kevin online at:
Kevin Torres Podcast
Unknown Speaker 0:00
If you are the foundation of your family, you are the firm footing. They build their lives on. You carry a glorious burden and you never dream of laying it down. You carry it with joy and gratitude. You show up, even when you don't feel like it. You lead, serve, love and protect. You are a father. This is the dead word podcast where men are forged into elite husbands and fathers by learning what it takes to become harder to kill, easier to love and equipped to lead. Get ready to start building the only legacy that truly matters. Your family
Curt Storring 0:59
welcome back, gentlemen, this is Curt Storring, your host and the founder of dad work and I am excited for this episode because I have Kevin Torres. On the podcast I was recently on his podcast you might have heard me there the dad bod WOD podcast. And I just realized that Kevin and I have so much in common in terms of the way we think the way we're trying to help dads live the best possible life for themselves, but also for their families and for their legacies that I had to have money and I'm glad I did because man we are going to be destroying the dad bod today there's going to be a super actionable episode is going to be going deep into all the things you need to actually take action today. If you are busy dad and you need to get your fitness sorted, because guys, nobody likes a dad but it's not actually cool. And man I'm gonna get cancelled for saying that. It's not shaming, I'm not condemning you no big deal. You can do what you want. But I have found from my personal experience that getting ripped, getting lean, staying fit and healthy, drastically improves the man husband, father I can be so we're gonna help you out today. If this is on your radar, and guys, he's just hanging out Kevin anyway, it's gonna be a great podcast. He has really really good ideas here in terms of mindset as well. So you're gonna get a lot out of this no matter where you are on your journey. Kevin Torres of DadBod wat and that is W O D as in workout of the day is father of three little girls and the founder and head coach of the forging elite fathers program. Kevin has made it his mission to help busy dads go from Dad Bod to fit dad without sacrificing family time, while creating a legacy of health and fitness for their families and generations to comm. You can find him on Instagram DadBod underscore WOD or go to forging elite fathers.com/diet to watch his free masterclass on how you never need to go on a diet again by using some simple frameworks that he has put together for you. So this is gonna be a way that you can stay fit for years to come without all the yo yo dieting. This episode, we cover obviously how to destroy your dad bod for good. Why staying fit as a busy dad doesn't require hours of work and sacrificing your family. Kevin's five step plan to getting fit and leaving the legacy of health and fitness for your kids. The Seven Habits that will lead to success if you follow them every day, understanding that every fitness program actually works. And the difference between success and failure, the importance of community accountability, having a guide and finally simple frameworks for getting fit without crazy dieting or falling off the wagon. Alright guys, this is excellent. If you want to learn more about all that stuff I just talked about go to Dad.Work slash podcast to find the show notes. You can also download my free elite data habits stack at Dad.Work slash habits. That is all the things I do on a daily and weekly basis. Found out over many years of trial and error. These are the things that actually work that don't make a ton of time that have you showing up elite in your family. You can get those for free at Dad.Work slash habits. Alright, without further ado, welcome Kevin Torres to the deadwood podcast. Here we go.
All right, Dad's here for another episode of the downward Podcast. Today I'm joined by Kevin Torres. And man, I was just on your podcast, which is amazing. I had a ton of fun. And I was like you just come on mine because I think that we are really aligned with so much of the stuff that we talk about in our lives. So first of all, welcome, and thanks for doing what you do, dude, because DadBod is not cool.
Kevin Torres 4:00
Well, first of all, thank you so much for having me. And it's I'm truly honored and yeah, did you I think the episode that we recorded together for the database abroad podcast was probably the best episode that I've ever recorded on my podcast and over 160 episodes or so. And like the one that I was the most excited about to share with my audience because it's like they needed to hear this message is something that I kind of like shied away from for a while. skirted around it. And then I think we just attacked it head on and it felt really good. And even that was just scratching the surface. So
Curt Storring 4:29
man, thank you for saying that. So guys, check out the DadBod WOD podcast is that. Is that the name of it? Yep. Okay, yeah, go to Apple Spotify, wherever. You can listen my episode and then hopefully just subscribe and listen to the rest because I think Kevin's laying down stuff that you guys need to hear. I'd love to start with your journey. Like what is the deal with the ad Bhagwad Why did you started this? presuming you just didn't like you weren't Jack the whole time. You weren't like the best dad all the time. So do you want to just like give us an overview of where you're coming from and why you decided to start this and sort of what the impact was on your life. If,
Kevin Torres 5:01
yeah, so the long story is I've never really been in shape, you know, like my entire life through middle school, elementary school high school. Even when I was in the army, I was in the 101st airborne for four years, two tours in combat in Iraq as an infantryman, and even then, the one place that I should have been in tip top shape, I wasn't even like the fittest of all the guys, right? So like, fitness is always something that I struggled with. When I was in middle school, I was way more into guitar Nirvana and all that stuff than fitness. Right? I wasn't, I wasn't a jock. I wasn't into basketball or football, just into the guitar. And so anyway, you know, when he separated from the army, though, I was still eating and drinking as if I was rocking and running five miles a day. And I quickly gained like, around 40, maybe even 50 ish pounds, I'm only five, eight, and I was up to like, 236, almost 240. Alright, so you can imagine on a five, eight frame what that looks like. And at the time, I was dating my now wife. And so of course, dining out, doing all that stuff, right? All that stuff just packs on the weight, and I wasn't running or doing anything like that. So I quickly realized, like, Man, I need to do something. So I kept defaulting back to like my old ways of like the army style, like just go run, just go run, just go run. Finally, I realized that wasn't working, I ended up hiring a trainer. And then I got into fitness, right? Fast forward a couple of years. And then my wife and I get married, we have some kids. And at this point, now fitness was already an integral part of my life. I was a middle school history teacher and eventually middle school vice principal, but I was already like, I was personal training. on his side, I was leading small bootcamp classes. CrossFit, level one, all that stuff. So fitness was like a really important part of my life. And then when we started having kids, I can no longer go to the gym, as you can imagine no wife on the planet. Oh, yeah, you need to go hang out at the gym for an hour or two, and commute 20 minutes both ways. And then when you come home, you're gonna want to shower. So it's like a four hour turnaround time, no problem, just do what you have to do honey. Like there's no wife on the on the planet who's like down with that, right? So I was like, going a little stir crazy. And I figured I'd have to do something. So every time she would go take the baby to nurse, I would do like push ups and air squats in the living room just for like 10 minutes. And I was getting enough of like a sweat. It was like scratching that itch enough was like, Okay, that was good. That was good. And it helped like ease that. Anyway, by the time we had baby. Number two, is when like, the gym was definitely out the window at that point. And so just by chance, our first daughter, for whatever reason, just would not nap in her crib. She would she was like a really good sleeper. She just wouldn't nap in her crib. So one of us would have to take her for like these two hour epic walks in Brooklyn, in her stroller, right? Rain, snow, cold, hot, whatever. She was going in that stroller, we were going for, like a two hour walk. And one day I was like, super exhausted. And I was like, You know what, let me just do like 10 She fell asleep was like, let me just do like 10 burpees. Just like give myself a little energy. So I did 10 burpees peeked under the canopy and she was still asleep. I was like, let me do 10 More, do 10 More burpees peek under the canopy. And she still seemed like, okay, so finally I did 100 burpees. And I was drenched in sweat. I was like, that was freaking awesome. And she was still sleeping. And then we continued our walk. And I was like, oh, tomorrow, I'm going to do that again. And then I started doing that every day while we were going on these walks. And then when I started recording these videos, because like other dads need to see this. And I started posting those videos on Instagram. And maybe even my wife gave me the name dad bought one. I don't even know how I got the name, how the name came to me. I think she's like, Oh, that's funny, you should post that Bhagwad. And I was like, wow, that's really clever. But again, with no intentions of anything, just posting it because I knew other guys needed to see that you can get a really great workout in 10 minutes, and not have to go to the gym not have to do all that stuff and not have to take away time from family. And, and then from there. Yeah, it just kind of took off. And then with the pandemic, especially all that sort of like escalating, but yeah, that's sort of like how DadBod started.
Curt Storring 8:52
Man. That's amazing. And I love that you found the the just the the simple solution to get moving, because that's the thing that I hear all the time, right? Like, I personally go to the gym, my kids are nine, seven and two. So you know, they sleep really well. I go first thing in the morning like five, and it works, right. But I hear from a lot of guys who are like, well, I've got like five months old. I can't just leave. And so to give them something like that to just get moving. It's not an excuse. And that's the thing that I want guys to understand from at least this episode, if not like everything like there is no excuses. You can do the thing and work around your family like they're not a burden. You know, like there is a burden as a father that you carry the weight of your family for sure. But the kids are not supposed to be a burden you're not supposed to just like check out right so is that like the types of guys who come to work with you now? Are they super busy? And they're just like, Man, I can't get to the gym like what do I do? And is that sort of why people are now seeing that dad Bhagwat as a program, which I see in your shirt forging elite fathers. I love the language is that most of you're working with now?
Kevin Torres 9:48
Yeah, so what typically, I think, in in in my audience and my community what what we see the most is people are have no idea how to navigate this new chapter in their life right there, they're married, they have a couple of kids, and they're still relying on the things that worked for them when they were in their 20s. Right. So it's like bodybuilding, splits, chest, and back Mondays, you know, legs Tuesdays, and again, nothing wrong with that. I love that stuff. And every, every, everything works, right, every program out there works, every diet out there works. But these guys are relying on what worked for them in their 20s. But that no longer fits their current lifestyle in their 30s and 40s. Right, because Gone are the days where people just have unlimited time to go to and from the gym, spend an hour working out commuting each way. And all that stuff, especially when like you're in the throes of early fatherhood, where you have all those demands, pulling for your attention, right? And the things that like you love to do, and that you even need to do for yourself, like tend to fall by the wayside. And so most of our guys are trying to like navigate that. And when we tell them like our super simple solutions of like, short 1520 minute full body workouts, a sensible nutrition protocol, where you don't have to cut out carbs, you don't have to cut out all kinds of food groups from your food, all you have to do is like just be mindful of like what you're eating attract that stuff. And you could actually see, you could work out less and eat more and still get into great shape in your 30s and 40s. And I think that's like what people are waking up to. And it's pretty exciting.
Curt Storring 11:15
Man, you said something there, everything works. And I agree wholeheartedly. And yet, people jump around all the time, like, Oh, is it keto is a crossbow? Is it this isn't that? But you're right, man, like everything works. And I've done a ton of different things myself, and it all can work. Why do people keep jumping around then? Is it a commitment issue? You want to talk about that a little bit?
Kevin Torres 11:38
Yeah, I think it's it's a little bit of like shiny object syndrome. But I also think the real issue I think is like Pete, it's a matter of like finding what works for you in your unique circumstances today. And what ends up happening is people end up trying these advanced strategies like intermittent fasting, or keto or CrossFit even right. And think that the basics aren't going to work for them. Right of just like, you know, do some push ups and squats, eat a balance of proteins, fats, and carbs with every single meal, make most of your meals at home, you're gonna see amazing results if you just do those things. And then you hear about intermittent fasting. And it's like, oh, cool. I'll just I won't eat for 16 hours, and then I'll eat whatever I want for eight hours. It's like, okay, well, you could do that. But you could also do that and not be in a calorie deficit. If you want to lose weight, right? You can starve yourself for 16 hours a day. And then but what do you eat in those eight hours? McDonald's? Chipotle, Kentucky Fried Chicken, unlimited amounts of beers? Well, guess what, you're never going to lose weight, right? Or keto? It's like okay, I'm gonna do keto now. So I'm gonna cut out all breads and rice from my life. I'm never gonna eat pizza again, I'm gonna have a miserable existence, right doing this keto, and then, but like, I'm gonna eat like so much more fat than I normally do. Or I'm severely under eating because I've just cut out these food groups, but I don't know how to smartly replace the calories with like, good proteins and good fats. And so there's nothing wrong with keto. There's nothing wrong with intermittent fasting. But those are advanced strategies that people jump into without having like a really solid foundation. That's like point number one. But the original point that I was making about sort of just like not knowing what works for you in your unique circumstances, like Zumba. For example. You could have an aunt who lost 50 pounds doing Zumba who absolutely raves about it. She's like, Kurt, you have to do Zumba. You have to do Zumba. It's like, okay, and then you try it. You put it on in your living room. You're dancing and like your leotard. You're like, this is not going to work for me, right? I tried it twice. It sucks. Zumba Zumba sucks, right? Or worse. I suck like, something's wrong with me. Like, I can't commit to doing the Zumba DVD every single day. My aunt who was like 50, and like 200 pounds, she has been able to do it. I can't even do it. I must suck. And it's like, no, no, you don't suck, dude. Zuma just, it works. But it's not going to work for you in your unique circumstances today, right? The music, the leotards, whatever dancing in your living room might just not work for you. So like, same thing with CrossFit or bodybuilding splits or whatever it's like, just find the thing that works for you. And that's going to take some trial and error that's going to take some like, I'm going to commit to this thing for a month or two months and see then revisit it versus like, Oh, I'm going to do one or two of these workouts. I don't like it. I want to try one of these two keto meals. I don't like I tried intermittent fasting for a week. I didn't really like it. And so just like one acronym I heard, which I really appreciate is focus. And it's just follow one course until success, right? So if you can just focus, follow one course until success. Right? Then you have some data to analyze and say this worked, or this didn't work.
Curt Storring 14:39
Beautiful, man. I'm just going to sign up for zoom because the way you were saying it sounded amazing. It's exactly the kind of thing I
Kevin Torres 14:44
love I know of yours, right? She's, you know, I gotta get into, but there are testimonials for everything out there is if it didn't work, there wouldn't be those testimony. Companies getting results
Curt Storring 14:55
precisely. I was talking to a buddy about this yesterday over coffee just like a witcher Like which platform? Should I focus on gotten like Instagram? Oh, no, but I heard Pinterest. Oh, no, but I heard Facebook Oh, no, but I heard you too, but it's like, pick one of them, pick one of them that you enjoy and stick with it for an extended period of time, and you will have success because they all work. And one of the things that I think this touches on as well as like to simplify, that's one of the points I wanted to talk to you about. I want to get into like your habits and while your five step process and your seven core habits you've talked to guys about, but one of it is just like this simplicity. And especially as busy dads, like if you just have a few non negotiables and a few like basic rules that you can get things around, you don't have to worry, like I used to, which is like, Oh man, I gotta find the perfect workout program that I'm like putting into my phone, it's taking hours. And I'm gonna for a while it's like, I don't know how I like this. And it's like, Go change everything. But if you just know some of the basics, and I wonder if there is like, is there anything else to add on simplicity? And then maybe we can get into those the steps and the habits you were talking about?
Kevin Torres 15:55
Yeah, I mean, I again, like to your point in terms that people do overthink it, right? It's like, you know, carb cycling, or this, you know, should I do hyper hypertrophy or or isometric movements and plyometric movements. It's like, dude, if you just did push ups and air squats, and you did that for 10 minutes, like a circuit of 10 minutes of 10 Push Ups followed by 10, air squats, 10 push ups, followed by 10 air squats, and literally just kept doing that for 10 minutes straight, you would be drenched, you would get a great pump. And if you did that three or four days a week, you would be fitter than most people your age in a year from now. Right? Because you know, push ups is a great upper body movement. It's working your chest, it's working your triceps, it's working your arms, right and air squats, working your glutes, your hamstrings, your quads. And by doing a full body workout like that, you're stimulating your metabolism to stay in overdrive, versus like doing 10 minutes of bicep curls, you make a great pump and you have like awesome biceps, but you're not gonna get like the metabolic effect that you would if you did like a full body workout of just push ups and squats. Now, the one caveat that I'll say is like doing push ups and squats every day, for the next year, maybe can get boring. And so that's why you want like a little variety, right? So then add some lunges, maybe add some pull ups or throw some dumbbells into the mix, right. But it doesn't have to be these overcomplicated workouts. or fancy movements on a BOSU ball balancing like a kettlebell over your head or anything like that, right just push ups and squats, push ups and squats, some lunges, some back rows, or pull ups if you have a pull up bar. And then same thing with the nutrition piece. Right? Again, like when you think like download a diet plan, right? Look up a meal plan and you're gonna get stuff in that meal plan that you just don't want to eat, like saffron infused are making saffron infused like salmon over like golden potato, who's making this stuff like I don't have time to make a saffron or anything, right. But I can make a sandwich, I can make some scrambled eggs in the morning, I can make oatmeal, right? And so if you keep it really simple, you know, and and let go of all the excuses that you might have around meal prepping like, oh, but if it wasn't for my kids and their snacks if it wasn't for my wife and the way she eats, if it wasn't for my family, it's like, Wait, let's pause for a second. How many meals do you actually eat with your family? Right? Let's go through your day. Do you eat breakfast with them? Probably not. You probably are like two ships passing in the night during breakfast time. Right? Do you eat your lunch? Not if you're working from home or at the office? Right? You're not around your family? Then you have your snacks? Probably no, because again, you're still at the office or something. Dinner, yes, you're probably having dinner with your family. So 20% of your daily meals, right? If you're having five meals a day, more or less 20% of that is with your family, the other 80% You're by yourself, you're on your own. So stop blaming your kids and their snacks, you know, the goldfish in the house, the Ritz crackers, the gummies the Skittles, all that stuff. It's not your kids fault. And don't blame your wife and the way she eats and all that stuff. And don't blame your family and their genetics and all that you might have some bad habits from like your genetics, and from the way you were brought up, but you know, you stop blaming everybody else and realize that 80% of the meals that you have throughout the day is on you. And you control that stuff. And if you can keep it really simple and don't think about oh how am I going to cook all these things? Do a turkey sandwich with cheese, avocado and some lettuce on there. That's perfect sandwich or proteins, fats and carbs. Oatmeal with some peanut butter and then aside of scrambled eggs, perfect protein balance, you know, protein fats and carbs, right. Bag of beef jerky and an apple on the side. Do you go protein fats and carbs right? Greek yogurt with like a banana? Blueberries and some peanut butter. Yogurt. Yeah, and all that and all that stuff is so easy to make at home without meal prepping. Literally takes five minutes to put together a meal like that.
Curt Storring 19:48
Yeah, man. The couple of things are for me. So I one of the things that we do in our family meetings we have weekly family meetings and one of those per month I will go through and I will write out a dinner meal plan form My wife on the calendar because she loves to cook, but she hates thinking about things to cook. So I just go, Okay, we're having this, this, this, this this, if she doesn't want to do that, that day she changes it. But that way, if she knows what to do, it's easier for her, it serves her and I know what I'm going to have for dinner that night 90% of the time. And I mean, I'm a little bit extra. I'm going really hard right now, as you know, on the picnic, amazing. Thanks. But what I do is I base the rest of my meals around dinner. So like I'm a little bit extra, as you know, as I just said, so I'm, I'm able to put more time into it. But I'm tracking all my food in chronometer, you can use my fitness pal or whatever, but I build my dinner first guy gonna have 200 grams of pork tenderloin and two grams of rice salad, whatever, that gives me this amount for the rest of the day. And I just build my lunch and my breakfast and snacks around the dinner. So that like you said, I have no excuses. And I'm not tempted like oh, well, I just gotta get something quick here. I better just go into the fridge. Oh, no, it's kids food. It's like, dude, no, you have to set up yourself for success. And maybe we can talk about that. Because I'm definitely gonna get into the habits. I want to get to the process. I want to get into like goals and stuff like that. But are there things that you talk to guys about to stop sabotaging themselves? Because that is huge guys go into the pantry, right? They're like, Oh, no, I better eat this. Like, how do you talk to mental game? Because I think that's a huge part of this.
Kevin Torres 21:20
Yeah, well, just to go back to what you were talking about the way you describe like your meal prep and how you sort of like account for those calories in the day. Again, like tracking calories and tracking macros, like that's like a base. I would say it's the macros is like a little bit more of an advanced strategy. tracking calories is like a good base. And the analogy that I say that it's tantamount to keeping a budget, right? If I told you Hey, Kurt, you have $100 to spend on your meals every single day as your per diem for working for me. I don't care how you spend it, just here's $100 Have at it. However, if you're brand new to budgeting, I might say hey, Kurt, here's $100. And here's how I want you to spend it, I want you to spend $25, for breakfast $25 on lunch $25 on dinner, and that leaves you with 1250 for a morning snack and 1250 for an afternoon snack $100 Boom, right? And if I give you those parameters, and those guidelines are like, okay, cool. You could spend $25 on breakfast and lunch and dinner. And then you have some snacks and you know how to spend your money, right? Because you need those, you need those like guidelines, those parameters. Now, when you become a little bit more advanced, you might say, Okay, I have this $100 But you know what, I don't need to spend $25 on breakfast, I'm just gonna grab like a bacon egg and cheese bagel that's like $5. And I'm going out with friends tonight. And that's probably gonna be more like 40 or $50. I want to save some of this money for dinner. And so Okay, so then you take the 40 or $50, put that in your dinner envelope or your dinner wallet right now that's accounted for. And you have only $50 to spend throughout the rest of the day, five or six or $10 At most for breakfast, and now $40 For lunch and your snacks, right? So if you think about it that way, you know, that could also be really helpful for some people. Because I tell people guys, like you want to have Oreos, you could have if three Oreos is like a part of your life where you absolutely have to have it every single day for your life. And you're like, Oh man, I keep sabotaging my diet at night. I always have snacks. I always have snacks. After I put the kids I always have snacks, like okay, cool. So when you wake up in the morning, put the snacks into your tracker first. And now you just build your day around it, you can still have your Oreos every single night if you absolutely want. Just that's accounted for already, though, you can't spend that money anymore, right now you can spend the rest of the calories throughout the day. So that was to your first point. Any reflections there before I jump
Curt Storring 23:30
into the microphone, I'm just thinking about this whole podcast, this whole episode is like it's just going to be called destroying the DadBod. Like we got to just go here hardcore. We're going in a little bit of the nitty gritty here. And I'd love to get sort of into parenting and how this affects you as a father too. But let's dive like deeper into this. So please do that's amazing. I love the analogy and I do that one thing I will say, Dude, I I get these like sweet cravings once in a while and I never act on them. But I make sure to plan for them when I want them. So for example, the other day, I made this PB fit yogurt bark and it's frozen and I write macros so I've got that in my fridge when I need to snack. The other thing that I did last night is I made these like protein heavy donuts with this like super low calorie frosting on top a little bit of like low fat cream cheese. They're like 100 calories and like 1312 and one for protein carbs and fat dude I can smash those the end of the day and feel like I've just had a dessert and I love that so to your point if you want to have Oreos, budget them but also you can like put a little bit extra work and and don't even need all those calories you would have had and you can still get that sweet kick. So that's my contribution. Please continue.
Kevin Torres 24:37
No Yeah, no, I love that Woody. When I was really tracking Mike, you know, when I was tracking macros and really getting dialed in. I remember that one of the pitfalls for me was making snacks for my kids. Because you know, I am working from home and because I run my own business obviously and so when my kids are home for summer I you know every time I have to get them to snacks, it's like, you know, licked. spoon of peanut butter, right? Lick my, you know, whatever the yogurt. And you know, whenever they would have like some crackers or something I always sneak in some crackers are like, Oh dude, then I have to go put it into the tracker. Then when I was like no, I'm not gonna I'm gonna just account for these first. And I'm gonna acknowledge I'm just gonna have 10 Crackers, I know it. And so I put aside 10 Crackers, so while I'm making their snacks, I can snack too, and then not hate myself, why don't I have enough discipline to stop snacking while they're, you know, ran, it just gave me that freedom to just be like, Hey, I'm gonna, I'm gonna have some snacks while I'm making my kids some snacks. And that also freed me up to sort of like not hate myself for not having the discipline to withhold licking the spoon of peanut butter, when I'm making them a sandwich or something.
Curt Storring 25:41
That's a huge point on the mindset because that's sort of where I was going with this is like those small things and planning ahead so that you don't crater because that's a huge thing. If you're going like for 75 hard for example, I know some guys doing that I've never done it. But you gotta, you gotta like start over again, if you so called fail. And that can be very demoralizing. And guys, just don't start again. And so if you build in, like I wouldn't say failure, but just like humaneness into your plan, so that you don't have to judge yourself and then go into that negative shame spiral. Because a lot of guys get into this, they're like, Oh, I'm going to crush it. And then their motivation dies down after day 10 Or whatever it is. And then it's like, oh, just quit. So maybe that can be the next part of the conversation is like mental fortitude, discipline, and going after the initial excitement. How are you helping guys in your programs get past that first little like hump of excitement when it starts to get really real?
Kevin Torres 26:28
Well, the the main thing that we do is we have like our seven core habits that we do every single week or every single day that that actually into week. And so, you know, we have a whole community of guys in our program who are posting that, you know, their wakeup times and posting their workouts for accountability. They're posting their nutrition totals at the end of the day. And we're sharing wins often, right? So when guys are in a community of like minded people who all have a similar mission who want to succeed in this area of their life, who also want to see you succeed, it's difficult not to also like, given and also be, you know, a rising tide lifts all boats, you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with whatever knowledge, you know, phrase you want to say. It's true, though, when you're surrounded by people who are better in a certain area of your life that you also want to get better at, or who are also striving to achieve a certain mission that you also want to succeed at Wright, who are on a similar path, you're going to succeed as well. Likewise, or conversely, if you're surrounded by people who aren't on that same mindset or same wavelength, who don't have those same values, who don't really care about this certain area of your life, like maybe they don't care about their diet or their health, you know, you might have like friends and close friends and family who who are like that. And guess what if you if you have like five overweight friends, you're gonna be the sixth one, right? If you have five friends who drink every single time they get together, you're gonna be the sixth one, right? If you have five friends who, you know, who have chronic illness, like, you know, you're going to be the sixth one, when it comes time for that, right. And so that's sort of like how we keep our guys on task is, you know, we have daily check ins, weekly check ins, daily accountability, and all that stuff. But ultimately, like, at some point, you have to take off those training wheels too, right? There's only so much like a coach can do for you, or a program can do for you at some point, like you're by yourself. And you have to do these things, too. So one of the things that we try to make people aware of is just like your daily habits, your routines, the things that you sort of, like, get stuck, doing, like in a cycle without knowing it, right? You know, because like, so much of our day is like on autopilot, right? We do all these things with automaticity. And so we try to create like a level of awareness for within our within our community of like, okay, next time you find yourself doing this thing, like what was the antecedents, right? Like, if you come home every day from work, and the first thing you do is you have a beer? Well, at some point, you were having a, you didn't just do that as a part of like your daily habits for no reason. At some point, maybe you had a bad day at work. And you came home from work. And you were like, I need something I need to relax, I need to cool down I need to unwind before I could be like a good person. So you open the fridge, you have a beer, right? And so the queue is like the bad day at work, you come home that the action or the reaction is you have a couple of beers or you have one beer and instantly you get that sort of like little rush that little like I'm a little buzz. And now I could talk I'm happy. I'm jovial, and that sends that feedback loop where it's like, hey, now my wife is talking to me. And I'm actually not being a jerk to her for a moment, right until I have beer three or four. But you know, at least after beer one I'm not yet. And then you know, and then that feedback loop is like, Oh, that was positive. We came home we had a beer and we had a better night for it. So day two, whether or not you actually are having a bad day at work or not. Maybe you come home and not having a bad day. But when you walk into the house and then you Oh yesterday I had a beer which made my night much more pleasant. I'm gonna go grab a beer today. This time you don't need it, though. So you grab the beer, and you have like a similar experience, you get a little buzz, it feels good, you get that positive feedback loop. And then by day three, day four, now you're stuck in a routine that you never intended to get stuck on, you find yourself making sure that you always have a fridge stocked full of beer. And you've been doing this for a day, two days, three days, three months, 15 months. And now you're 1820 pounds heavier wondering how the hell did I get 1820 pounds heavier? And why am I why do I drink so much? Right? Because one day, you got you got you had a bad day and you came home and you had a beer, right? And we do this with so many things, so many snacks in our life, like driving to work, you forgot your your breakfast one day, you forgot to make coffee when they because you're running late. So you stopped at Starbucks, it was convenient. You also pick up a donut. And then it was like, Oh, that was so convenient. So the next day, you're like, you know what, I'm not gonna make coffee on purpose. I'm just gonna stop at Starbucks. And because I'm getting coffee, oh, they're the doughnuts. Now I get a doughnut and a coffee, right? You get those associations. And so that's how, like, we just accidentally get stuck in these loops driving home from work, you stop at fast food every single time you leave, you leave job, you leave your job, like whether or not you're hungry, you're stopping at McDonald's for something. And so that's the thing that we encourage people to do, like, what is happening? What are the routines that you're stuck in, that you need to break out of in order to actually like, hit, you know, achieve the goals that you want? And then how can you actually replace those routines with empowering routines?
Curt Storring 31:20
And what is the process on how guys are noticing this, and then how they're replacing that?
Kevin Torres 31:26
So why don't we take them through like that, what I just described as sort of like the habit and routines, like sort of like workshop where we just sort of like highlight this, the these this process first. And a lot of that, whether it's Tony Robbins has like a four step framework for how habits are designed. And James clear also has like a similar four step process, right? Like the cue the action response to reward or something like that I forget exactly. And so we walk them through that. And then their task is to sort of like identify what areas of their life that they're noticing that this is happening. So like, you know, like the beer example, like Okay, so now that we know that this is like a thing, like, where do you find yourself, like constantly getting stuck? Is it like, you know, like, you're having snacks every single day, every time you walk into, you know, every time you walk into the office, if you have like a box of trail mix in your office desk, guess what? You're gonna associate sitting at your desk with eating, if you eat in your car, every time you get in your car, whether or not you're hungry, you're suddenly like, Hmm, I should be eating something I should have like, I should be not, you know, munching on something, right? You because we create these associations. So once we we identify that process for them, and then we have them like, reflect where in your life? Do you? Are you seeing this stuff? Like where are you getting stuck. And then we think of like ways to create new empowering routines instead.
Curt Storring 32:45
That's amazing. Okay, let's, let's try and dive in. If lost their trade secrets, into the like the five step process, the seven core habits you mentioned. And, and by the way, I just want to mention the simplicity factor, the stick to itiveness. And the community is why I love hiring trainers and coaches and programs. Because like I have had reasonable success and being I don't know 80th percentile. And I don't mean to say that like arrogantly or anything like that. Like I've always been reasonably good at a number of things. But it was only when in all areas of my life, I joined a men's group, I got a fitness coach, I did this, I did this, I did this, like all those communities helped me actually stick to it. And then I just get pumped up being part of it. Like of course, I'm going to share what time I woke up because I crushed it. Today I woke up at 430 I did my workout, you can see that, and I'm going to share it. So just want to put that into a guy's ears as well. Because like, you can do a lot alone. But in my experience, no matter what it is anywhere in your life, you can go way, way farther with a guide and a community. So anyway, yeah, but
Kevin Torres 33:44
and but not even. And on top of all that it's like, for whatever reason, we know that intuitively in other areas of our life, right? Like when it comes to schooling, you know, that you need professors, you know, you need a mentor, because there are certain, you know, sort of like gatekeepers to, you know, to knowledge and to income levels. And so we know that, all right, if I want to access this, I have to go through this process. But then with other things that that don't feel where it feels like it's free, or it feels like I could do this on my own. We think we don't need help, right? Like, I don't know anything about woodworking and sewing. And I'm like the worst handy person ever. I'm from New York, you know, like, I just don't know, I suck at that stuff. Like, I know, I need to hire people to do those things for me. But then when it comes to something else, like cooking, for example, it's like, I could figure it out. I could whip something together, when in fact I probably shouldn't be anywhere near still right like, but like and so I think it's just acknowledging like, like we can get support in all areas of our life. We just have to like actually acknowledge that we do need support and stop thinking that we can do this on our own. And just like, you know, hire somebody who can hit the fast forward button for you so you can learn from all their mistakes. Not make all their mistakes and make way more progress in way less time.
Curt Storring 35:04
Yeah, I love that man. And that's one of the things that I try to talk to guys about. With our programs. It's like, you could do nothing. And you could try and figure it out. And then you could take 10 years like it took me and then you realize that your wife and kids didn't wait around for you. And then like, Wow, that's some regret. Or you could you know, join a program but it's like, we hired golf coaches, we hire business coaches, we you know, join whatever it is what like you're saying we're the gatekeepers are, but the most important things in our life are fitness, which is going to keep us hopefully living along active lifestyle with our families, and how to be a good dad itself. It's like, these are the most important things in the least amount of people actually pay for either commitment, or accountability or expert help in those places. Man, if I knew that I could just like hire trainer 10 years ago, if I knew there was someone putting out like, how to be a good dad and a good husband, dude, I would have been all over that. Because the pain that it lasted for me for like, almost 10 years, is not worth it, dude. And I got very lucky that my wife and kids basically stayed around. And that was very close in some situations. But I don't want to get the end of my life, look back and go, Oh, no, if I had just done something 10 years ago, you know, it would have been better. And I don't want to lose that. So I love that you said that. Because it could be the difference between like a legacy that actually matters, and then a legacy of regret. So thank you.
Kevin Torres 36:23
And actually speaking of, of legacy, and what you just described of the 10 years of your experience, like I've gone through your beta program, and as I as I've gone through that program on like, how to yell less and lead more. Every time you mentioned, like this new concept or this this like little hack or this, this framework of thinking, this framework of discussing this framework of like, you know, becoming self aware in the moment so that you don't blow up. I'm thinking like, man, what book did that come from? What book did this guy read for this? Oh, what book did this thing come from? Oh, that's a really cool, like phrase, like, what book did that come from? It's like, I don't have to have read the hundreds of books or spend the hundreds of hours that Curt spent researching this stuff and experiencing the sufferer himself. It said I have the course right, like the one stop shop where I could like, hit the fast forward button died, download all the information, like in the matrix, right, like, learn how to fly this helicopter, like, all this information, and like, and save 10 years and ultimately saved my marriage and saved my like, my relationship with my kids. Right? So yeah, that totally resonates with me a ton too.
Curt Storring 37:31
Nice. Okay. At long last, can you share with us the five steps and the seven habits, or however you want to present that to us that can get guys dialed in?
Kevin Torres 37:39
Yeah, so it's super, super simple, I think in like a big picture. Sort of like if we think about this, like, as a macro view, we have a five step roadmap, right? And this five step roadmap is really simple. And we the way we've distilled these five steps, is through trial and error, right? So we've had hundreds of guys come through our program. And when I first opened the doors to coaching online, you know, I knew what workout they should be doing. I knew how people should eat, right? I knew how they should like form their habits, but there wasn't sort of like a framework. I was just taking people through this process. And after taking, like hundreds of people through this process, I realized like, there are like five simple things that we need to focus on. Because there's so much noise out there, right? And even as a coach, I was getting distracted, like, Oh, should I include carb cycling? Oh, should I include, you know, progressive overload? What should I What's the next thing that I should be focused on? It's like, no, if they just do these five things, they're going to see long term results, right. So one is just dialing in your nutrition with by eating a balance of proteins, fats, and carbs with every meal, right, in the right portions, of course, and, you know, we'd walk you through what that is. And what I would say is for like a super simple Starter Guide. Like if you don't want to start tracking your calories, if you don't want to start tracking macros, it's eat five ounces of protein, five ounces of carbs, and one to two ounces of fat for breakfast, lunch and dinner. What you do with that is up to you, if you want to have tilapia for your protein, or if you want to have steak or if you wanna have tofu, it doesn't really matter. You could be a vegetarian and still see amazing results. For your carbs. You want to have rice, you wanna have potatoes, I don't care what you want to have, don't have bread. Sure, just keep it to five ounces. For your fats, you want to have nuts, olive oil, peanut butter, avocado, it doesn't matter to stick within those guidelines, five ounces of protein, five ounces of carbs wants to answer the fat and have as many veggies as you want. Nobody has ever gotten fat eating vegetables, right? Spinach, all that stuff, like just eat them unless unless they're like dousing in like butter and frosting. Like you're not bad for you. So just eat as many as you can. And if you just did that for breakfast, lunch and dinner with some smaller portion snacks in between, you would never have to go on a diet again, you would hit your ideal body weight, you're probably not going to get to the point where you're like in the single digit body fat right? But if you have 20 3040 pounds to lose, and you just stuck to that what I just described five ounces of protein, five ounce of carbs. Once two ounces of fat, you would steadily lose weight until you hit your ideal body weight, and then you will be able to maintain that for years to come without ever going on a diet. And if you ever have an Off Plan meal, like pizza, burgers, all that stuff, it's like, okay, who cares? My best days come after my worst days, my best meals come after my worst meals. My best interactions with my wife come after my worst interactions with my wife, meaning you have to intentionally have like the best meal possible the next time. So if you mess up for, you know, like Fridays, for example, he's like, Oh, it's Friday. Well, there goes the whole weekend. It's like, no, no, there goes Friday night, Saturday morning, just get back on the horse, man, the whole weekend, not over. So anyway, that's step number one. Step number two is to workout at least three times a week, and we're talking long term, right? I'm talking about like, I don't care if you get abs in the next 12 weeks, what I cared is if I called you in three years from now, you'd still be like, dude, I'm feeling great. I'm still working out three times a week, my nutrition is pretty good, right? Like, I feel great, I have more energy, I'm sleeping better. I'm running around with my kids. That's ultimately what I want, right? So it's not for me, it's not about the abs in 12 weeks, it's about like the results in three, four years that you're still doing it. So that's why I say step number two is work out at least three times a week, obviously, more is a little bit better, right? Five days would be great. But if you're working out three times a week, that'd be great. Now, it's not just doing bicep curls three times a week, right? You want to do minimal equipment, full body workouts and high intensity ideally, right. So think, you know, a short 20 minute workout of air squats, push ups and burpees. That's a great full body workout, you're gonna see amazing results or like I said earlier, just push ups and squats for 10 minutes. That's a full body workout. It's it's intense, you're gonna keep your metabolism in overdrive, or even just sprints, you go outside, go to the you know, go to the street and do 10 minutes of Sprint's. 30 seconds on 60 seconds off. 30 seconds on 60 seconds off. And that's a workout. You don't have to go spend 60 to 90 minutes at the gym, you can. But again, that's more of an advanced strategy, if you like how do you get this muscle right here, right? It's like that one little muscle right there. That's how you go sculpt it for 90 minutes. But if you're just trying to get fit and healthy, 20 minutes is plenty. Step number three is then working all on your mindsets, right? It's about like identifying those limiting habits, those habits that we talked about a little bit earlier, and then creating new empowering habits. So where are you getting stuck? How can you replace that with something that's going to actually set you up for success, okay. And then when you put it all together, that leads us to step four, where you become a Fat Burning Furnace. So you can literally stabilize your blood sugar, you could burn fat as fuel and you could burn more calories and a third of the time when you eat a balanced proteins, fats and carbs in the right portions with regular intervals. And when you do high intensity interval training workouts, because when you eat a balanced proteins, fats and carbs, it stabilize your blood sugar you never your blood sugar never spikes because you're having too many carbs. And your blood sugar never crashes because you're starving yourself, you stay in like a nice homeostasis there. And then when you do high intensity workouts like Sprint's and burpees, and all that stuff, for whatever reason, it keeps your metabolism in overdrive for like 24 to 36 hours compared to like a 30 minute steady state run. And then step five is when we put it all together, we create a legacy of health and fitness, you become a role model of health and fitness for your family, for your wife, for your kids, you inspire your friends, your family, and others to also do the same. And so one of the things that I always ask guys is like, are you thinking about your health, the way you're thinking about your wealth. And what I mean by that is like, a lot of us are like, Alright, I gotta grind, I gotta make this money. I gotta, like, you know, have a successful business, I have a successful career. And I ultimately want to create an amazing, like life for my children, a house, leaving money I want to pay for their college, I want them to never have any desires that I had growing up, right? And if that's awesome, and keep doing that, but are you thinking about the legacy of health that you're also gonna leave for your kids. So if you're having two liters of coke on your dinner table, and you eat nothing but mac and cheese every single day from the box, and you know, you guys snack on, you know, m&ms every single day, and chips and all that stuff. That too, you're passing down to your family, right? And is obesity and chronic disease and diabetes is something that like our is all that stuff, genetics, and hereditary, like, sure to an extent it is. But more often than not, it's a lifestyle that gets passed on from generation to generation. And so when we say like you can create a legacy of health and fitness, we literally mean that when you prioritize your health and your fitness, your family will live a healthier and happier life, too. And they like you can have a kid who goes to college and gains a freshman 15 Also, or you can have a kid who goes to college and as the weird kid who goes running on the weekends, and when their friends are like, Why are you going running? It's like, I don't know, my dad and I used to just go riding, it's relaxing. It's fun. I enjoy it. And I like to I like to do it. And I'm not even on the track team. Right. So,
Curt Storring 44:54
man, that is the legacy you want to leave. You want to leave something that your kids see you doing and model the behavior Hear because that's what they learn it and exactly right man, like, whether it's fitness, whether it's food, whether it's like well yelling, communicating, loving to all that kind of stuff, like all of it is the legacy that you leave by simply being there with your kids living the life you live. So this is part of becoming that elite man that we talked about so that your kids can have a good role model to follow. Do you want to get into these the seven habits like these are some of the things you're talking about presumably like waking up on time getting your workout in track, or you know, posting that you're doing the meals? Like what what is the what does that entail that guys can just like plug and play because I'm really big on habits. As you guys might know. I've got like, I put out a free habit thing that I've done to really get myself in. So yeah, what what kind of things can guys get that are again, simple, but doable.
Kevin Torres 45:46
And I love your habits sec, as well. And I still do the daily tube all the time I wake up, practice gratitude. And then I do your guided meditation. And Siri, like your voice is literally in my head every single morning. And in particular, it though when it's like, your kids are not doing this to give you a hard time, they are having a hard time, right. And it's like up to you to help them like navigate that to help them feel safe. And like those words, like they're not doing this to give you a hard time they are having our time, every time we hear that I'm like, alright, that's like the one line that I needed to hear every single morning, I listened to it, even though it's 10 minutes long, if I could just listen for that one line. But, but in terms of habits,
yeah, I mean, there's so many habits that we can, you know, again, so many habits, right? Like this thing, and that thing. And what we did is like, just distill from all the noise, drown out all the noise. And if you just focus on these things, you're going to see results. So one is wake up earlier, and just get your alone time, right. Because as a dad, as a busy Dad, if you keep telling yourself, you're gonna get it done throughout the day, the day is gonna run away, right, you either run the day or the day runs you. And, you know, especially on the weekends, like you wake up, your kids have practice or they have a thing that they're going to or birthday parties and all that stuff. And then what's going to happen, you and your wife, we're gonna get into a fight because you didn't get to go on your run, right, or you didn't get to go workout or something like that. And it's like, well, I had to really work out. And then I, you know, I can't tell you how many guys who've told me like they got into fights their wife, because like they wanted to work out. And then you know, they just couldn't so wake up earlier because nobody's awake, your kids are still asleep, your wife is still asleep, have coffee by yourself in the quiet, do a short 1520 minute workout, meditate, you know, practice gratitude, whatever you want your morning routine to look like, you know, we can talk about that as well. But like, just wake up earlier. And I don't care if you just wake up earlier and have some coffee and do some push ups like that's way better than letting yourself sleep in. And then the second one is that I always recommend is like just getting your workout first thing in the morning or move first thing in the morning. If you have like a gym workout that you want to do later in the day, fine. But in the morning, you should still do some kind of movement, whether it's push ups, squats, going for a light, little jog, some yoga, even like whatever it is, just get your body moving before the family wakes up again, you want to be ready to receive your family, right versus like, you know, like, they come rushing and you're like, oh my god, I'm not even awake yet what's up, right? Whereas like, by the time I opened my kids bedroom door, like I've been awake for like two hours. And I've done so much I've not worked on it worked out I made breakfast. And so by the time like they're waking up, I'm like ready to receive them and I don't have anything else in my mind. That's like weighing me down. So number one is wake up early. Number two is move workout. Number three is you want to track your nutrition. As annoying as that might sound, you want to keep some kind of track some kind of budgeting of your nutrition, whether it's on paper, which I don't recommend or my fitness pal. And whether it's a specific calorie goal or not, or macronutrient goal or not is less important, but you want to just track it because you pay attention to what you track right? Period. Again, same thing with like metrics. Same thing with like your budgeting, if you don't know where your money is going, you don't know how to make those adjustments. Number four, and this gets more specific to my actual community is to attend at least one coaching call for a week. So we host multiple coaching calls throughout the week. We host around like four or five different office hours throughout the week. And but we just say like guys, you know, you don't have to come to all of them. But if you're at least coming to one a week, you're going to see results. Now if you're not in a program, then what I would recommend is that you have some kind of accountability buddy, or something that you're at least checking in with once a week. And which also brings me to step number five, which is completes a weekly check in. Right so the guys who have had the most success in our program, they're the ones who are leaning in being vulnerable, being candid in there and they check in every single week. It's so easy for dudes like us, you know who are high performers who are successful in other areas of your life, that when you have like a little bit of a failure, you want to like hide away right? And so you avoid the check in you avoid checking in with your coach or you avoid submitting the thing because you don't want them to See that your macros are actually all messed up, or that you ate m&ms. And so it's like, difficult to sort of, like, face that shame. And realize that like, nobody's gonna shame you, nobody's gonna yell at you, right? Like, they're gonna give you feedback and support to keep you on track, right? So lean into those check ins be candid. And what's crazy to me is like, we actually have some guys who come who come through our program, and like, their check ins will be like one word answers, like, it's like, you know, how would you rate your weekend? It's like, good or great. It's like, dude, like, let's, let's pause for a second, like you need support, you reached out for accountability coaching, like, great, is that an acceptable response? Like, let's go, you know, the more you give, the better you get. Meaning like, the more information you give, the more candid you are, the more you honest, you are, like the better feedback, support, guidance coaching you're going to receive, right, so don't hide anything, because it's not going to do anybody any favors. And then the last two is
I would, some people might say, this is not like a good thing. But we recommend that you weigh yourself daily, at first. And this is good again, whether or not you're in a program or not just start weighing yourself daily. Because again, it's just another metric that you can measure. Imagine stepping on the scale, and you're five pounds heavier than you were the day before? Well, it's gonna cause you to reflect on what you did the day before, right? Like if you someone just getting your five pounds, everyone's like, holy crap. What did I do yesterday? Well, it's like, well, I did eat seven pounds of Baskin Robbins last night. So maybe that's what happened, right? So but at least you now know what caused that. And at least you now know what the effect of that was. And or conversely, let's say you step on the scale, you're down a pound or two. And it's like, hurray, I'm down a pound or two. But what did I do yesterday that actually led to that? Well, I did drink all my water, I did track my nutrition, I did go for that run, it makes sense that I've done a pound. And now imagine what your body would look like, if you did that every day. Or conversely, if you had that ice cream at night, and you did gain all that weight the next day, like, Well imagine what your body looks like in a month or two from then if you do that every single day, right? So we do encourage guys to not we encourage we say you have to weigh yourself every single day, at especially when you're first starting out. After you've been doing it for a long time, you can do it, you know, bring it down every couple of days or something like that. But we're stuff every day to start whether or not you're in a program. And then the last thing is to take progress photos, you want to take pictures of yourself every single week. Again, whether or not you're in a program, because I can't tell you how many times like I've been like, Yo yoing my whole life, right? I've been when I was 240 I think I have like a few pictures from that era. But we like burn those pictures even though they were digital, I still found the way to burn them. You know, like I was like, I'm not looking at these pictures ever again in my life. And now I regret that I don't have those pictures, because why they would make for an awesome before and afters. But to because like, I just I want that memory of like this is what happens when you let the guardrails when you don't have guardrails, right. And when you take progress photos, you see yourself naked every single day in the shower, when you come out of the shower, you look in the mirror. And so when you could, you could lose 510 pounds, and it doesn't look like it to yourself, right? Maybe your clothes fit a little differently, or, or, you know, you feel you know, the scale says you're 10 pounds lighter, but you look in the mirror, you're like, I don't really see it, I don't really see it. But when you could see a side by side from like, 10 weeks ago, you're like, Oh, my God, look at my face. Look at my neck, look at my love handles, wow, I am making progress, it's gonna be really encouraging. And it's gonna allow you to, like, keep building on that momentum versus like, you know, again, like I've lost 20 3040 pounds before, and I don't have the before and afters. So I was never satisfied with where I was, I always looked at myself, like, Ah, I don't look good enough. I need to dial it in. I don't look good enough, I need to get even better. I don't look good enough. I need to start myself even more, right? And then but it's like, but if I just had that picture shirtless from when I was 230 or 240. I may be like, This is freaking Brad Pitt compared to that dude. So
Curt Storring 53:57
man, that's so important. I do the same thing to like, I, I will just look down and it's like, oh, man, I got so far to go. And then you look at the original pictures side by side and say, oh, man, this is amazing. And like, I will take pictures still. And, and like even posting on Instagram for like my own benefit. It's like, I cannot believe that I'm here now. And I don't want to get into that habit of going like, oh, it's never enough. It's never enough. It's never enough. Because that's all too easy for a lot of men and a lot of business owners especially looking for that the gap instead of the gain. So I want to be able to be grateful for where I've come from and see the success rather than only focusing on Oh, I'm not exactly where I want to be yet. And it just keeps me like more grateful. It keeps me more grounded gives me more present. So I love that man. Thank you for sharing all that because I know that's like if you just again, same as a habit stack I've got if you just do these things every single day, you can't fail. And it's like, whoa, why haven't I been doing this before? Like if there's a block there, whatever deal with the block, do the work, do some journaling, hire a coach, whatever. But if you just do what we talked about, destroy the DadBod man and one One thing I want to mention as well, I've seen that you posted if you guys want workouts like you post workouts on your Instagram all time, right? Yeah, I see them. I'm like, Oh, do this looks like a sweet, quick workout with like, very minimal stuff. So yeah, if you if you don't know how to work out, like just go follow Kevin, as well. Yeah,
Kevin Torres 55:15
they're literally like 1000 workouts. They're from, like the last three years or something that I've been posting, remember, I told you, I started this Instagram account with no intention of anything. So I was just posting workouts because I knew other guys needed to see it. And then eventually, during the pandemic, you know, I was, you know, still in middle school vice principal, but we were working remotely and people started reaching out like, do you offer any coaching? Can you coach me? Can you coach me? And at first I was like, not really. I was even though I was in person, personal trainer, and like a bootcamp instructor. I was still kind of like, not really. And then funnily enough, people asked me, I was like, Yeah, you know, what, I can't help you. And so, but again, like that Bhagwad was never intended to sort of like, Oh, I'm gonna make this like, Empire, this business from it, or whatever. It's like, what do I want to sell stickers? Sell T shirts, you know, I was like, What am I gonna do with this account? So yeah, they're all those workouts are literally there for free for the taking, like over 1000 workouts,
Curt Storring 56:03
man, that's amazing. Okay, so I want to be respectful of time, I think we got like four minutes left. But I think maybe the last thing we can get into is, actually, maybe maybe you can help me here. I want to get into planning and intentionality. Because I know it takes a lot of that to do these sorts of things. And I'm sure it's impacted the rest of your life. But also, there's this idea of like goals and vision. Because I have found it's way easier to stick with this kind of stuff. When I know it's to be a better dad. I want to serve my kids and my wife by showing up better in fitness and mindset, and all the rest that kind of stuff. So do either of those planning intentionality versus goals and vision? Does that lock in anything, there's anything come up for you that we can just finish on?
Kevin Torres 56:38
I mean, with goals, I think the big thing is, Are you clear on what you want to achieve? And why you want to achieve it? Right? So again, like I talk to hundreds of guys, and oftentimes, it always starts out really surface level or really, like shallow. And again, there's nothing wrong with having superficial goals. So I want to be very clear, like if you want abs, that's awesome, right? But it's always a hey, what are your goals? And if you're like, I want to get into great shape, or I want to get fit, or I want to get healthier, and it's like, okay, well, what does that mean? Right? Like, does that mean losing 20 pounds? 30 pounds? Is that mean? Like getting off of certain meds? Does that mean? Like your biomarkers look a certain way? Like, what does that mean to you? And so the first thing is get really and again, if you know business owners who are listening to this, in the entrepreneurs, guys, were successful in your career, like you are applying this principle in other areas of your life, you don't go to work anyway. All right, what's our quarter two targets, like I don't know how to make more money, right? You have specific goals, like certain metrics that you're looking for, like, we're going to make this much money, or we're going to add this many people to our email list, or we're going to do this many partnerships. So you have specific goals. And then yet with this area of your life, you're not applying those same principles that have helped you be successful in other areas of your life. So what I'm saying isn't groundbreaking, I'm just telling you to apply those things to this thing. And it's going to work. So again, get really specific on what you want to achieve. Like I by Christmas, I will be down 20 pounds, right? And rather than just like wanting this thing to happen, like write it down as if it's an affirmation as if you have achieved it, right. Like, like, by, you know, today's you know, we're in November right now. So say by November 2023, comma, I m dot, dot, dot and then write down what's true about you in a year from now. I'm a world class coach and father, I'm a, you know, I'm a role model of health and fitness. My family, I'm a lean, 180 pound guy, I could run five miles without stopping. I have visible abs, I can maintain it my abs, year long, you know, your your long abs, year, round abs, whatever those goals are for yourself. And again, superficial goals are, there's nothing wrong with them. But just write down what are your goals, but then why are these goals important to you? Like, why must you achieve these goals? And what I want you to do here is you might have done this exercise in other areas of your life, but you want to ask yourself, why at least five to seven times. So why do you want abs? Well, because I want to be fit and healthy. It's like okay, well, why is being fit and healthy, important to you? Well, it's important to me because I want to live longer. Okay, well, why is living longer important to you? Well, one because I have kids and I want to be able to like walk my kids down the aisle and be there for them well into their adulthood. Okay, well, why is that important to you? Well, because my dad died, you know, when I was 10, and I grew up without a dad. Okay, well, why is that important to you? Well, because by not having that, like, father figure my life, like, there were certain things in my life that I had to figure out on my own, or figure out why watching other guys and or TV. And I really just didn't have like a great example. And so like, as such, like, by the time I got into college, I was kind of like, lost. No, that's, it's like, okay, well, why is that important to you? Well, because then that limited. My potential I settled for jobs that I shouldn't have. I settled for women that I shouldn't have. And my relationships with women were shit because they didn't have a good example of what a man could be. And so why is that important to you? Well, because then I had to, I don't want that for my kids. So it's like, oh, that's your goal. Right? So yeah, you want to have ABS, why? So that your kids don't have to experience what it's like to not grow up with a father so that they don't have to know what it's like to, you know, feel insecure about being themselves about getting into crappy relationships about not having somebody that they can ask for work advice from, right. Like, all those reasons like that's going to take your goal from like, I should, like, I should lose weight, I should eat healthier, I should work out more to a must like, I must achieve this. Because what's at stake is like my kids growing up, and like navigating this world without me and that's really scary, bro.
Curt Storring 1:00:33
Like, I've got goosebumps because of that, taking it from like, I want abs, to I don't want my kids to feel like the failure and the insecure little boy that I was insane. And I also recommend this to guys to ask what and then why, over and over and over again until you like get to a place where you might cry. That's been really successful for me, right? Like, that's so interesting that this, what you just said is, it's fairly true for me. I mean, I was like 24, or five or whatever, my dad died, but he was 50. And he just died of a massive heart attack because he was not doing any of this. I don't want that to happen to my kids. I don't want to have a wife, I don't want happen like to anything. And so it's like, of course, I'm gonna be dialed in, of course, I want to like look good, feel good, whatever. But long term, it's because I want to be here. And I can't imagine my kids growing up without having me until I'm really old. Like, I want to be ancient. By the time they're like, Oh, I can't ask my dad for anything anymore. Because man, the amount of times the last eight years have gone. Like, if I could just ask my dad this or that'd be so sweet. But I've had to thankfully the all the mentors and stuff in my life have really stepped up my grandfather all the rest of it. But anyway, that's story for another day. Dude, this has been awesome. This has really truly been like the how to crush the dad bod episode. And I love it. Because as you guys know, if you follow me on Instagram, I'm pretty sure that that post that I made about real men being able to benchpress their wives and run their kids is what got me shadow banned. So if you haven't seen my stuff on Instagram, that's why and I was talking about Dad bods and not to condemn, but to offer hope that it's so important for the reason that you just said, which is not about the apps. It's about everything that comes after that. It's about the discipline, the love, the service, the commitment, the sacrifice that you now get to give to your family. And I just wanted to say, you know, you should do that instead of just eating whatever you want. Because you want the taste on your lips because oh, I just can't help myself. It's like, dude, there are bigger fish to fry. So anyway, love this. Thank you so much, Kevin, where can people find you your program? Anything else you want to
Kevin Torres 1:02:20
say? Yeah, obviously on Instagram, Dad Bod underscore y w o d just means workout of the day. So Dad Bod Pod, on Instagram. And then if you want a free webinar that I put together on how to never go on a diet, where I literally will walk you through step by step how you can plan your whole day. And like sample meal plans and everything, just go to forging elite fathers.com forward slash diet. And there, you're going to find this awesome webinar on how to never go on a diet again. And seriously, if you just implemented everything from that workshop, like you would hit your ideal body weight, and then be able to maintain that ideal body weight for years to come.
Curt Storring 1:03:00
Man, beautiful. Okay, I will put all of those in the show notes. Dad.Work slash podcast, as you guys know, dude, thank you so much. This has been mazing. And I cannot wait to continue to build relationship with you. And I love what you're doing, man. So thank you for being here.
Kevin Torres 1:03:12
Kurt, thank you so much, man. I'm truly inspired. And to your listeners, thank you so much for letting me you know, jabber on this this entire hour as well. But seriously, Kurt, like, I love what you're doing. And it's really inspired. Like, it's so inspiring. And it's so it's inspired me to just like, step into this even more for like myself and my family and, and be more vulnerable in this area of my life too. Because it's something like, like I told you in my podcasts like you were saying the quiet things aloud. Right you were saying the things that I were that I was already thinking about that I just couldn't say aloud. And I was like this guy is saying the things that I'm feeling and thinking. And it's like, like how brave that you know how brave of him to be able to just say this. And so I really admire him for that
Curt Storring 1:03:53
man. Oh, thank you so much. I'm glad that you're the type of guy who actually implements that because I've seen a man so thank you so much for that very inspiring, and we'll catch up soon. Thank you for listening to the Dad.Work podcast. That's it for this episode. But if you would like to stay in touch between weekly episodes, why don't you go over to Instagram and follow me there because I draw up a number of things throughout the week that are related to what we talked about on this podcast but usually go a little bit deeper. provide some tips you can find me on Instagram at dad work dot Kurt. That's da di W O RK dot c u r t. And please, if you have been getting something out of this podcast if it has touched you if it has improved your marriage, your parenting or your life, would you please leave a quick review on Apple or Spotify. leave a rating. If you have a few extra seconds leave a quick review. That's the best way that we can get this work in the hands of more fathers. And I truly believe that we change the world. One fathered at a time because each father that parents better that loves better raises children who do the same. And in just a couple of generations. I feel like we could be living in a world much better than the one we live in today. Your review will help along that path. I thank you so much for being here to listen until next week. We'll see you then.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
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